POLITICS

5 Times Donald Trump Proved He Was Innocent

Donald Trump is the most innocent president of our time.

Amidst the House's mounting Trump impeachment inquiry, only one thing is 100% certain no matter what the facts end up being: Donald Trump is totally innocent.

We know this because he tells us on Twitter, and if there's one thing we can all agree on, it's that Donald Trump never lies (and even if he was pretty much lying 84% of the time, that's only to troll stupid people, and by that I mean college-educated democrats and people who can read).

So who cares if the Whistleblower's statement has been proven accurate in a line-by-line dissection? And who cares if the White House definitely tried to cover up the details of the Ukraine call. If Donald Trump says he didn't do anything wrong, well, he's the president so I believe him. So in celebration of how truthful and honest our President is, and how much I believe him no matter what he says or does, I've made a lot of 5 times that Donald Trump was completely innocent.

Sexually assaulting tons of women

Donald Trump has never sexually assaulted a woman. Never. Never ever. And even if he did and admitted to it on tape, let's be honest, not a single person who voted for him would actually care. But we know he didn't do it because he denies it, and that's good enough for an idiot like me!

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